"It's a Birthday Party
and you probably won't be invited..."
Ok, there isn't really an invitation like this, but I feel like maybe there should be! When I began our homeschooling journey, there have been a few things that have become "side affects" of our decision, and being invited to birthday parties is one of them.
My kids rarely get invited to birthday parties. They go on around us in the neighborhood, but my kids don't seem to get invited very much. Is it because they are weird? No, I don't think that's why. I honestly think it is because the kids around here, when they DO have parties, invite all their classmates, which puts their party at Maximum Capacity, so they don't get around to inviting their Primary friends, or neighbor friends. Which wouldn't really matter maybe if you attend public school and don't get invited to one party, because chances are your another classmate will have one and you'll get invited that one. BUT, if you are homeschooled and don't have classmates, that aren't their siblings, the chances of getting invited to a birthday party are pretty slim.
So, what is a homeschooling momma to do about this when she has one particular child that WANTS to go to parties SO very badly, but the invites don't come? (As I type this, she was delivered an invitation to a party that I am pretty sure she was quickly added to the guest list because the party girl invited Addie today at church before checking with her mom.....awkward! I wasn't sure how to handle this one....."So and so said I can come to her party.....", says Addie. "Oh, well you didn't get an invitation......", says I. Oh dear.......BUT, she was able to get an invite and yes, I got kinda teary-eyed as Addie received it. It means so much to her.......)
I have heard that in order to be invited, you must have a party and do the inviting. True. So we have done that when my kids want a friend party. Seth has never once asked for, nor had a friend party. He couldn't care less about that kind of stuff. So funny.
As I have been kinda upset about this whole thing this evening, I had a great idea. Why not host a "Big Birthday Bash" in the spring or early summer for all homeschoolers? Have it at a park. Have lots of cake and ice cream, and games, and even a small gift exchange!! Why not?? Maybe there are other mothers who have kids that want to get invited to birthday parties, but just don't seem to be remembered all the time, so this might appeal to them. My mind is thinking of ideas.......this might work. With some help from some other mothers, we could pull it off.
Sometimes we get our feelings hurt and it isn't intended. I truly don't think people are excluding my kids. Sometimes things happen and we can't do anything about it, and sometimes we can. We will just invite ourselves to the party. I always enjoy a good party. Especially if there is cake and lots of it!! :)
5 thoughts shared:
Love this! What a fun idea :)
Hey Megan -
I don't think it is a homeschooling thing - my kids have never been included either. They have few, few, few friends in the ward. It has been that way since we moved here. We had better luck, strangely enough, when we lived in our apartment before we moved to our house. Hang in there - I love that you throw your own party.
Amy Sessions
Megs! So I am finally catching up on my blog, which reminds me to check everyone else's blogs! (SO much better than Facebook!!!) :)
I've missed reading about your cute family. I love all your pictures and your commentary- I can totally hear you saying all this.
Good luck with everything. You are such an awesome mama! Love you!
You are spot on with your thoughts on birthday invitations (or lack thereof). My kids are only invited to birthday parties of homeschooled friends or primary friends, but those invites to primary friends' birthday parties have been few and far between for all three of my older kids. I am certain it's because of what you said: the kids invite their classmates first and hit "maximum capacity". In our particular circumstance, we don't live in the neighborhood -- we are on the "edge" of the ward boundaries, so I'm certain we get forgotten since the rest of the primary kids live by each other. I don't fault anyone for that -- it is what it is, you know? For a long time it bothered me that my kids weren't invited to more birthday parties, but now I don't care so much. My kids don't even ask for "friend" birthday parties unless I suggest it. :) Odd, but sure saves me a headache unless I want it! hahaha And I think your birthday bash is a wonderful idea!!
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